Romance versus Reality

I think when all of us begin the foster care or adoption journey we have a fairy tale mindset about the outcome. We see ourselves holding a tiny, drug-addicted newborn- wrapping him/her in a snuggly-soft blankie and rocking him/her to sleep. Or we imagine a school-aged child who has come from a home rocked with abuse and neglect….and in our minds’ eye we scoop them up, take them shopping at the Gap, and they are forever grateful and indebted to us for ‘saving’ them. In our little fantasy world, we sleep all night, are responded to with love and respect, every problem has a upfront and concrete answer and we are masters of our own destiny. After all, we are answering God’s call….

Then the train leaves the station. And the trip is a little rocky..there’s still beautiful scenery along the way, but storms brew and rains come and the journey seems to linger. Such is foster care and adoption. Lives in the balance often falter. Children who come from hard places often challenge us beyond our abilities and we are driven to our knees (which is exactly where we should be!)

I was reading this post to Cara just now and she asked me why I was writing about this subject. The reason is that after my last post about Kevan, I realized that even after 17 years of fostering, I still romanticize situations. I asked for some detailed information about Kevan and found out that there are issues I was unaware of. However, that doesn’t mean God doesn’t have a providential plan mapped out for Kevan’s life!

In all of the situations we face with foster care and adoption, when we persevere through adversity, lives are changed, hearts are turned, and the heavenly Father is gloried. Ultimately, the reality can turn out even sweeter than the romance.

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Published in: on October 30, 2010 at 11:41 pm  Comments (1)  

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One CommentLeave a comment

  1. We’re just starting out. Thank you for this post. It will be nice to remember in days to come as I have my own romance vs reality stories to share.


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